The holidays can bring warmth, connection, and moments of joy — and they can also be deeply challenging when you’re living with ME/CFS, Long COVID, Fibromyalgia and other chronic complex conditions.
At Nourish, we talk often about doing things differently, not because we’re failing, but because our bodies require a different rhythm. This season, the community at Nourish has been sharing what truly helps — not aspirational advice, but strategies that actually protect energy, reduce flare-ups, and support nervous system regulation.
Here are the top five high-priority, high-impact strategies our community returns to again and again during the holidays.
1. Ruthless (and Compassionate) Energy Budgeting
Holidays tend to blur boundaries. Meals stretch longer, visits stack up, and expectations quietly grow.
A helpful rule many in the Nourish Community use is the 50-70% rule: plan to do only about 70% of what you think you can handle. That built-in buffer allows space for the unexpected — fatigue, sensory overload, or emotional drain.
Think of energy like a bank account. Every activity is a withdrawal, and without intentional deposits, overdraft (aka payback) is almost guaranteed.
2. Pre-Rest and Post-Rest Are Non-Negotiable
One of the most protective strategies is resting before you need it, not after you crash.
Before a gathering, appointment, or even a phone call, schedule intentional down-time: lying down, eyes closed, quiet, minimal stimulation. Afterward, protect a recovery window just as intentionally.
Many Nourish members share that this one shift — resting on both sides of activity — has dramatically reduced post-exertional malaise during the holidays.
3. Gentle Boundaries That Still Feel Like You
Boundaries don’t have to be harsh or defensive. In fact, the most effective ones often sound soft, clear, and kind.
Simple phrases like:
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“I can come, but only for a short time.”
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“I’ll need to rest after this.”
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“This year needs to be quieter for me.”
Shorter visits, flexible arrival and exit times, camera-off participation, or stepping away without explanation are all valid forms of self-care — not selfishness.
4. Protect Your Nervous System Early
Holiday environments are often loud, bright, busy, and unpredictable, all of which can overwhelm an already taxed nervous system.
Nourish favourites include:
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Noise-canceling headphones or earplugs
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Dimmer lighting or sunglasses indoors
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Warm layers, blankets, or weighted support
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Having a quiet retreat space available
Regulation works best when it happens before overwhelm hits, not once you’re already depleted.
5. Reimagining Traditions to Fit Your Capacity
One of the most powerful shifts is letting go of how things used to look.
This might mean:
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Simplifying meals or ordering in
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Gifting digitally or giving experiences instead of physical gifts
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Short voice notes instead of long phone calls
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Creating new, quieter rituals — tea by the tree, a cozy movie, gentle crafting, shared photos
Traditions don’t lose meaning when they change. Often, they gain tenderness.
A Holiday Note on Grief, Goals, and Guilt
If the holidays bring up grief for what you’ve lost, you’re not alone.
With ME/CFS or Long COVID, grief can show up in quiet ways — the body that can’t do what it used to, the version of you that could host, travel, shop, cook, or “keep up.” It can also show up as anger, numbness, sadness, jealousy, or that strange feeling of being on the outside of a season you used to be inside of.
And then there’s the goal-setting pressure that sneaks in at year’s end — the subtle (or not-so-subtle) message that you should be doing more, fixing more, trying harder. When you’re already managing a complex illness, those messages can turn into guilt fast.
A few gentle reframes the Nourish community returns to:
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Grief doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful. You can love parts of the season and mourn what’s changed.
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Your “win” might be smaller this year — and still real. Sometimes success is showering, eating, resting, or making it through an hour of connection without a crash.
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Guilt is often a sign you’re asking your body to meet someone else’s expectations. Your limits are not a moral failure. They’re information.
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You don’t have to earn rest. Rest is part of care, and care is part of survival.
If you’re carrying grief, it’s okay to make space for it — even briefly. A hand to the heart. A few quiet breaths. A simple sentence like:
“Of course this is hard. I’m doing my best.”
You deserve softness, especially here.
A Gentle Reminder
You are not failing the holidays by resting more, doing less, or saying no. You are honouring the reality of your body and protecting your long-term wellbeing.
Here at Nourish, we believe that ease is not laziness, and rest is not a reward. It’s a foundation.
If you’re moving through this season slowly, softly, and with care - you’re doing it right. 💚
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